I was at the grocery recently and as I was walking the isles, I noticed that many people were struggling with walking; some with a cane or a walker, and some were walking slowly, hunched over as if in pain. I noticed people were getting frustrated as they tried to pass them by because they were in a hurry, and clearly had stronger legs, more energy, and probably no pain. I took a moment to thank my legs. I have never felt so thankful to have strong, supportive legs that make it possible for me to get around easily.
When I went to the checkout stand, there was a very long line. The woman at the front of the line was slowly taking one item at a time out of her shopping cart. She was shaking, which made me immediately assume she had Parkinson’s. Each item took careful balance to get it on to the checkout counter, and I could see she was having a hard time. The people in line started complaining, rudely and loud enough for her to hear, which made her shake even more. And then she dropped a jar of spaghetti sauce, which broke and spilled all over the floor. Someone yelled, “people like this should have their own line.” This made me so angry. I turned around and looked him right in the eyes and said, “Wow. I really hope that one day you look back on this moment with regret, and that you wish you were not such a rude jerk." I walked over to her and helped her get the other items on the counter. Another woman went and got her a new jar of sauce. I put my cart aside and I helped her take her groceries out to her car.
After getting her groceries packed into her car, she thanked me for the help, and then said, “I am so embarrassed. I know I take a long time, but I want to keep doing as much independently as I can, until I can’t. I am so sorry for making everyone wait.” I told her she had absolutely nothing to apologize for, that it is the people who complained and were rude that should be apologizing to her.
As I was walking back into the store, I couldn’t find my cart. I asked the clerk, and he told me that one of the people in line paid for my groceries, and he handed me my bags. I am reminded how important it is to be grateful, thankful, polite, and kind. Sometimes people surprise me with their generosity and kindness.
We are all going through something. We have each experienced pain, and we know sadness and sorrow, some more than others. Some people do not share how deep their ache is, but that does not mean their pain is less than ours, it just means they keep it to themselves. At the very least, we can practice kindness, patience, and awareness when we see someone who might be struggling. And if they are going a little slower, if they need to take a little longer, or if they can't reach an item on the shelf or lift one out of their cart, that instead of complaining that they are taking too long, we exercise some patience, and we step in and offer to help. Imagine the difference that might make in their day.
Kindness is a language that when spoken, is something everyone understands. We need more of that. We are, or one day could be, "people like this." None of us are immune from aging, declining, and struggling.
Be kind.
xo Gabby
