When it isn't a beautiful death...
We all hope for a "beautiful" death for ourselves and the people we love... and most times, it happens, or it comes close. I am blessed to have witnessed many deaths which were peaceful and even beautfiul, but I have also witnessed some that were difficult and distressful.
I received a message today with a poweful question that I think some of you can absolutely relate to and I am so incredibly grateful she reached out, because she reminded me that it is not the same for everyone, and we need to address that as well. And not only do we need to address it, we need to find a way to comfort those whose last memories are that of struggle and distress.
This was my answer to her... and I understand it may not be the right answer for you... but I truly hope it helps comfort some of the hearts out there that need a little extra love and support:
" I believe that by the time it got to the point that you unfortunately had to witness, he was already gone... his spirit left... it was just his body that was struggling... not him. I have to believe that when something like that happens, the person who was inside that body, the spirit, the energy, the life... it left before things got rough or scary... they don't stick around because they don't want to be there any more. So try, if you can, to visualize him already leaving... perhaps somewhere else that he would rather be like the ocean or hiking in a beautiful forest... allowing his body to do what it needed to do... and when it was done, when it finally stopped breathing... he came back to you, so you could say goodbye, and thats where he stayed... in your heart... begging you to go back to the good memories... because that is what he wants you to remember...."
And if you know someone who is still struggling with a memory that is not that of a beautiful, and peaceful death... please reach out to them, comfort them, and help them to work through their grief because their grief... is really hard to navigate.
Sending love to all of you out there trying to navigate the loss of someone you love... do not do this alone, reach out for help, support and guidance... and know that I am always holding space for you as well.